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Hostess: Would you like a booth or table?
Young mom: A booth is fine.
Five-year-old: I don't want a booth!!!!!!!!
Young dad: Hey, knock that off or you'll be eatin' out of the trash can at home.

ovhrd

#409
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I agree, you are screwed (0) - You deserved that one (0)

Dec 30, 2011 09:23 AM - Kids - by Tom

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20ish guy: I invited a bunch of my guy friends over to play Transformers Monopoly yesterday, and nobody came because of the storm!

30ish guy: Maybe they didn’t come over because they knew there’d be no chicks at your place.

ovhrd

#408
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I agree, you are screwed (0) - You deserved that one (0)

Dec 30, 2011 09:23 AM - Friends - by Tom

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Where the hell is My Ponytail At? (Teen girl looking inside her purse)

ovhrd

#407
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I agree, you are screwed (0) - You deserved that one (0)

Dec 30, 2011 09:23 AM - Beauty - by Dougie

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Teen Chick #1: Eww, there are so many mosquitoes here.
Teen Chick #2: Quick! Get in the sun! They can't bite you if you are right in the sun!
Teen Chick #1, after pause: Are you thinking of vampires?

ovhrd

#406
0 Comments

I agree, you are screwed (0) - You deserved that one (0)

Dec 30, 2011 09:15 AM - Other - by Dougie

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Old woman looking at painting: She is ugly. She has a really ugly face. Look at her forehead!
Old man: Yeah, she's pretty ugly.
Old woman: But wow! She has great breasts!
Old man: But they're pointing the wrong way!

ovhrd

#405
0 Comments

I agree, you are screwed (0) - You deserved that one (0)

Dec 30, 2011 09:13 AM - Beauty - by Dougie

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Guy #1: You ain't even seen her in five years?
Guy #2: Naw...
Guy #1: Shit, man, that's a long time!
Guy #2: I know. I was supposed to see her, but then I got locked up...

ovhrd

#218
0 Comments

I agree, you are screwed (0) - You deserved that one (0)

Sep 21, 2011 07:54 AM - Other - by Jess

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